"Simpleng Balahuraan" was ages ago.

i bleed gray now. Emo kid ampota? Hinde. I just realized that I have better things to do than write about than the imperfections of other people. I might as well blog my own. ahahaha. Isa pa, high school and college are sooooo over. At hindi na bagay sakin ang mga ganung pagsusulat.

For more... bashing other people is much more fun when done verbally, don't you think? Joke lang. What I'm trying to say is... all-out okray publishing is over. I just needed to change the layout. WEH.

UPDATES:

DEC 22nd: Road Block
DEC 9th: Pending
NOV 29th: Beaching in November
NOV 8th: Tarot
OCT 11th: WEH.

Sige na, ako na ang laging late.

Pero sa maniwala ka ma't sa hindi, I am trying to kill this old habit of mine. Sa totoo lang, masakit na nga sa kalooban ang ma-late kahit ng isang minuto eh.

Parang kahapon. At kamuntikan na kanina.

Ang saya-saya ko pa, kasi aabot ako sa opisina on time. Alam ko, hindi naman ako kaagahang dadating, pero sa sitwasyon ko, accomplishment na ang makapasok kahit limang minutong mas maaga lang.

Natuwa pa ako kay manong driver dahil humarurot siya pagdating sa Peninsula; dire-diretso hanggang Insular. Sabay naipit kami sa kabagalan ng mga buwakaw na bus. Damn them, really.

8:00am ang time in ko sa opisina. Pero ikaliligaya ko sana ang umabot man lang ng 7:55am.

Lekat na bus.
I hate you, TXH 265.

Prophase - chromosomes are formed
Metaphase - they align in the middle of the cell
Anaphase - the chromosomes separate
Telophase - chromosomes move towards the opposite ends of the nuclei

4 phases. They go in cycles, they could go wrong along the way. But they go on, over and over again. Routinary as it may seem, what's definite is that it will continue. The phases do not go out of sequence, and none of them lead back.

No matter how I try to get technical, it will boil down to the same thing with life. Phases are there, and as much as we want to console ourselves that "This is just a phase," reality is it isn't. We go through such phases, and once we get to that state, all we can do is look back. Even if we try to just walk past it or disregard it, we are compelled to continue as turning back is not an option. After all, things won't revert to how they were before.

Life has phases. All we need to learn is to go on with it and accept the fact that things that happen are not "just phases." They are phases in their own right. We just have to gain the will not to get stuck, and have the courage to let go.

Tough move.

13Dec09: "You think you know, but you have no idea." Bakit nagpapakwento ka pa? Fulfilling ba yon?

15Dec09: If it's not your story to tell, don't. Ganon kasimple, diba?

17Dec09: Andito ka na pala. So, what brings you here?

10Jan10: Hindi dapat, but you (and even the slightest thought of you) make my chest heave. Not in a good way. Tssss.

11Jan10: I want to shrug you off, pero given ka na yata eh. Mahusay, mahusay.

Malungkot ako. Nalulungkot ako. Iniyak ko na ito kanina.

At habang umaagos ang luha sa aking mga mata (oo agos. it was that unglamorous), marami akong naiisip na gusto kong sabihin. Ang dami kong gustong ihayag. As in i-voice out. Out loud.

Sabi ko sa sarili ko, isusulat ko na lang. Kasi hindi ko naman masasabi ang mga ito in person. Edi eto, magsusulat na sana ako. Tapos, nawalan ng moment. Nawala lahat ng gusto kong sabihin. Hindi ko na naman mailabas.

Kaya ito, kinikimkim ko pa rin sila. Ni walang kasiguraduhan kung kailan ako makakalaya sa mga saloobing ito.

Napakatagal na. Ulit-ulit na lang.